


sirius & the gryffindor common room sitting in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G

by halfshook



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Fluff and Humor, Kissing, M/M, Marauders, Marauders Era (Harry Potter)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-05
Updated: 2021-02-05
Packaged: 2021-03-17 04:14:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,107
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29219334
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/halfshook/pseuds/halfshook
Summary: The kiss was short and sweet and Remus had smiled into it but it was nothing more than a simple farewell between lovers.But that was the problem. No one knew they were lovers.or the one where sirius kisses EVERYONE to cover up his relationship with Remus
Relationships: Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Kudos: 69





	sirius & the gryffindor common room sitting in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G

**Author's Note:**

> fuck jkr fuck her and fuck her shitty fucking transphobia (amongst her various other issues)  
> now we may commence <333

Remus really didn’t know how he kept getting himself into situations like these. 

If only Sirius had just kept his hands to himself this _never_ would have happened. 

***

There weren’t many people left in the common room by this time of night, even on a Friday. The Marauders and a few of the girls were the only ones who hadn’t succumbed to sleep yet and so there were very few witnesses to be called upon as proof for the events that followed.

They had all found themselves exhausted and wanting to sleep like the dead but none of them wanted to be the first to give in. 

Remus was the first to cave. He stood up and waved goodnight to his friends, too tired to get any words out but before he could stumble up the stairs Sirius had grabbed his hand and pulled him back in for a goodnight kiss. The kiss was short and sweet and Remus had smiled into it but it was nothing more than a simple farewell between lovers.

But that was the problem. No one knew they were lovers. 

Both boys froze. Neither knew what to say or how to react and Remus knew Sirius wasn’t ready to tell the others yet. They had both had _very_ different experiences of realising they were queer and Sirius was still teetering on the edge of denial. 

Remus didn’t want to push him over that edge, nor did he want to out them. 

They moved slowly and with calculated steps as if each other were a wild animal that they did not wish to startle. The only exception was their lips which they detached from each other as quickly as humanly possible. 

James looked up at the pair of them with an expression that can only be described as _WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK_ . His eyes were wide like a deer in headlights but it was _not_ a negative expression, rather it was one of extreme confusion. So extreme, that it seemed almost _forced_ but Remus thought nothing of it. 

Peter, who by this point was practically snoring against the armchair, sat up incredibly straight and the look on his face was almost accusatory but again, it was _not_ a negative expression, just one of extreme confusion. 

Before either boy could say a word, Sirius slid along the sofa and planted one on James. The kiss was still short and sweet but slightly sloppier and James didn’t smile into the kiss like Remus did. It was not unpleasant at all, rather they looked like they were both quite enjoying it. 

James didn’t pull away until Sirius did. 

Remus’ expression was inscrutable. His eyebrows had shot up and his eyes were wide with bewilderment and something akin to fear but not quite. He gave Sirius a look as if to say _Merlin! What do you think you’re doing?_

Then it clicked. He realised what Sirius was doing. _That sly bastard_ , he thought to himself.

Sirius got up off the sofa and moved over to the armchair that Peter was sat on. He leaned down to kiss Peter before he could say otherwise. This kiss was the shortest by far, nothing more than a peck and Peter was quick to pull away. He gave Sirius a startled look but Sirius just shrugged his shoulders and moved on. 

Lily was watching the boys with such a look that when Sirius started to walk across the room to her, she struggled to lower her eyebrows from where they had settled high beneath her wispy fringe. 

Sirius leaned in to kiss her too but before he could get within a foot of her face, Lily cut him off, “Don’t even _think_ about it, Black.” 

“I’m kidding, Evans. Prongs is the _only_ one who would wanna touch you with a ten-foot pole.” Lily could only roll her eyes in response. She huffed and turned back to the two girls sprawled across the sofa in front of her. Sirius shifted to face them too. 

James opened his mouth to defend himself but he didn’t get the chance, everyone was still watching Sirius to see what happened next. 

Remus had felt a little jealousy stirring in his gut when Sirius had kissed James. They had kissed with the familiarity of people who had kissed before and Remus was desperate to uncover that story. But now he couldn’t help but stifle his laughter at the shitshow that unraveled before him. 

“What d’ya want, Sirius?” Mary asked fairly innocently. 

“Well, I think that’s quite obvious by now, Macdonald, so pucker up.” 

This time Mary was the one who leaned in to kiss Sirius. The kiss was longer than his one with James but shorter than his one with Remus but only by a fraction of a second (not that he was counting or anything). And likewise to James, Mary kissed Sirius with some familiarity and _was that tongue?_

Remus could feel the jealousy stirring a bit more but he couldn’t bring himself to seethe properly when this whole situation was such a comedically horrendous shitshow. 

Last but certainly not least, Sirius kissed Marlene. It was nothing more than a peck but Marlene did not pull away until Sirius did. She thought better than to tell him in that moment that he just wasn’t her type. 

“Alright guys, well we’ll be off. I love you all, goodnight.” Sirius bowed, linked his arm with Remus and then headed for the staircase, brushing off the whole affair like it had never happened. 

Once the door was closed behind them and they were far enough up the staircase to be sure that they couldn’t be heard, Remus asked, “What the fuck was that little performance for?” 

“I panicked.” 

“Yeah, because that was a completely normal behaviour.” 

“I’d like to see you try, Moony,” Sirius retorted. 

“You would, _wouldn’t you?_ ” Remus leaned in to kiss Sirius. “My turn,” he murmured against his lips. This kiss was longer than all the others and they were both thankful for that. Remus paused for a second and pulled his lips away from Sirius’, “Someone was looking awfully friendly with James earlier, care to explain?” Sirius’ cheeks were flushed red with embarrassment, the realisation of what he had just done hitting him. 

“You’re gonna tease me so much for it, I’ll tell you about it later. Now c’mere, the dorm won’t be empty for much longer.” And with that he yanked Remus closer by his knitted jumper and tugged him into their shared bedroom. 

***

Somewhere below in the common room, James wondered aloud the following thought, “So, who’s gonna tell ‘em we already know.” 

**Author's Note:**

> thank you all for reading !! leave some kudos and a comment if u would like bc i rly appreciate them :))
> 
> this was inspired by a tiktok i saw about sirius holding james' hand to cover up his relationship with remus and that one friends episode where chandler kisses everyone to cover up his relationship with monica 
> 
> now for a couple fun things i didn't get to directly include  
> 1) marlene is a lesbian  
> 2) james n sirius are ABSOLUTELY the kind of best friends who practiced kissing each other when they were younger so that their 'real' first kisses wouldn't be shit  
> 3) sirius n mary used to date and sirius was a TERRIBLE boyfriend to her and my queen deserves SO MUCH BETTER


End file.
